The haul, 2011

One of the last things that Christmas should represent is overt commercialization - secular or not, Christmas should be about more than the crass act of consumption.  That being said, for Christmas I got stuff.  Stuff that I was excited to get.  So I'm showing it off, knowing full well that the emperor has no clothes, to extend a metaphor.  Gaze upon these works, you mighty...and despair:

I got a boatload of graphic novels this time around.  That's right, enough graphic novels to load a boat with!  Depending on the size of the boat.  Anyway, here we have the Dylan Dog collection, volume 2 of Joe Casey and Tom Scioli's Godland, and the highly anticipated Habibi by Craig Thompson.

Also among the stash is The Book of Genesis Illustrated by R. Crumb.  It's astounding that someone who has spent his life creating psychedelic, counter-culture underground comics can put something like this together and have it look so incredible.  It's ironic that this just might become his best-known work.

I've now got three of four of the Hellboy Library Edition collections.  It's beautiful stuff.

I got some cool Thing-related merchandise as well, including a Thing shot glass that is just awesome.  And I landed a Thing Squinkie without having to buy the entire damn set.

I got some DVD swag, too!  Season one of Conan: The Adventurer, Volume six of Futurama, Weird Al's Alpocalypse HD collection of videos, and the first collection of Adventure Time, a show I'm loving more and more with every episode.

Rounding off the display of cool stuff is a Magic Mouse for the Mac, some brand new Shrinky Dinks (pre cut?!  What the heck!!), and some Pac Man crafty figures.  Pac Man and his ghosts were made by my friend Vicki, who has a photo blog here.  Vicki did a bunch of video game themed figures that would totally sell for cash money on a site like Etsy.  Seriously, Vicki, open up a store.  And make me some Yetis.  I SAID DO IT!

I hope that everyone out there had a wonderful Christmastime.  Here's to 2012!

San Diego Scare, FUBAR celebrity endorsement, "Why does Marvel cancel my favorite unpublished books" and more!

Hey, kids!  It's another edition of "things I feel like posting", starring me, Jeff.  YOU SHOULD BE HONORED, PEOPLE.

- In September, I officially applied to the 2012 Comic-Con International show in San Diego.  I was disheartened to get a thin envelope - the sure sign of doom in any application process - in the mail just last week, but was perplexed when the envelope simply contained my voided check and a brief letter explaining "hey, we're returning your check" and nothing else.

I assumed that this letter meant that I was not accepted to the show, but upon contacting the folks at CCI, it was pointed out that the check was actually from last year.  The fact that they kept my check for over 12 months was fairly surprising, but I'll take it, because it means that Wagon Wheel Comics is still in the running for a table at this summer's big show!

- So John Schneider reading Teddy and the Yeti is officially old news.  Some fellow FUBAR creators caught up with Chandler Riggs, "Carl" from AMC's The Walking Dead and got this picture with him and volume 1 of the graphic novel.  Look how cute this kid is!  It's funny that he's on a TV-MA rated show and here has an R-rated book in his hand...is he allowed to watch/read either?  It's a cool picture regardless...and wow, what a show TWD is turning out to be.

- My trip to Myrtle Beach and Xcon World in October provided me with more than just two nights in the Viking Inn motel (an interesting place); I made it home with all my teeth and some swag from the Swampfox Media booth.  The Swampfox guys and girls are local to the Myrtle Beach area and had some really neat stuff on display.  My favorite was certainly No Rest for the Wicked, a supervillain spoof along the lines of Dr. Horrible.  Check 'em out at  http://swampfoxmedia.com/!

- The mainstream comic industry is going through some changes these days.  DC's "New 52" revamp is getting all of the attention (good and bad) these past few months, but Marvel is making news, too, in its, uh, "streamlining" of its output.  Several titles have even been cancelled before they were even released, and what's most frustrating about that is that SOME OF THEM STARRED THE THING!!

This is nothing short of an outrage.  I'm speaking, of course, about the "Destroyers" limited series, but there's also Victor Von Doom by Nick Spencer and Becky Cloonan.

Both DC and Marvel seem to be saving me money these past few months, with the cancellations of titles I read like Secret Six, Doom Patrol, Spider-Girl, Herc and now X-23 (which I had just started to pick up).  I don't mind saving money, but this all in all makes me a little bit nervous.

- Don't forget (DON'T YOU DARE) that tomorrow (Sunday the 20th, which I guess is today) is New Dimension's Pittsburgh Comics & Collectibles Show at Century III mall from 11:00-5:00.  I will be there, and so will...other people.  The Post-Gazette even put it on the "Weekend Hotlist"!  So you know it'll be great.

- Lastly, and this is the second Dukes of Hazzard reference I'm making in this post, more old Shrinky Dinks were found and made.  Who knew these things were this fun?  Well, I did, of course.  Larry has the whole ordeal posted up on his excellent DukesCollector website, which you can see by clicking here!

Sea Monkeys look nothing like comic books would let on.

It's a shame that Sea Monkeys aren't advertised in the back of comic books anymore - this really is a former comic book advertising staple that disappeared from modern comics, what, 25 years ago?  Regardless, anyone who digs through the back issue bin at a local shop is sure to find an ad for these seemingly magical creatures that appear from dust to form 1950s-style nuclear families with water and a bit of luck.  Despite my staunch opposition to the mistreatment of animals and the understanding that Sea Monkeys are both living things and probably easy to kill, there's still something exciting and fanciful about sending two bucks in the mail and creating an entire underwater society on a whim.

In stark contrast to the artistic renderings on ads such as the two above (Sea Monkeys are just like people! They live in happy family units, wear bows in their hair and fly kites!!), the first time I made my own Sea Monkey pod, I was shocked at the actual appearance of these mystical sea swimmers.  It turns out that Sea Monkeys are a hybrid version of brine shrimp (you know...what blue whales eat!  Oh wait, that's plankton) and they look something like this:

Creepy, right?  I mean, this guy's doing some kind of hideous backstroke, not barbecuing, building a castle or tossing around a football with junior, as was implied in all of the comic book ads.  Why, I'd go as far as to say that real Sea Monkeys don't act nearly American enough for the average comic book reader.  Where's your patriotic spirit, creature so small that the standard tank comes with magnifying lenses built in?  Why aren't you wearing a funny crown, trying on pants or buying nail polish for your wife?  Why aren't you out doing manly things in the open air (water?), positioning yourself so that a well-placed fin covers your exposed human-like genitals?  WHY DON'T YOU ACT MORE LIKE ME?!

I recently bought another batch of Sea Monkeys (16 or 17 years after my mom "accidentally" knocked our first family into the sink), and I'm happy to report that everyone is doing well (I think.  They're swimming a lot, which I take to mean they're doing well).  I even bought a number of things from the official Sea Monkey catalogue to make sure I'm prepared, like vitamin-rich "Red Magic" food, banana-flavored (flavored?) treats and a tiny manual air pump.  I'm gonna make sure that, overinflated comic book expectations or not, I'll take care of these guys as best I can.

Wait, banana treats?  I love banana treats.  Hey, Sea Monkeys: maybe we're not so different after all, you and I.

(For now the "tank" sits in front of my Fantastic Four bookends box...and some Shrinky Dinks).

Fun with Shrinky Dinks (and an all new Franks and Beans!)

I don't consider myself particularly nostalgic, but trips to Pop! Culture Connection in Greensburg, Pa do seem to have an effect on me.  Case in point - hanging on a rack I managed to find an unopened box of Marvel Super Heroes Shrinky Dinks from 1983.  The price was right so I bought the package and brought it home.

For those of you not familiar with Shrinky Dinks, it's almost useless for me to try and describe them, because they don't sound like they'd be any fun to actually make.  It's just something you have to experience.  Shrinky Dinks are still being produced today, but the 1980s were certainly the boom time for the company, and the licensed products (such as the Marvel brand) were at their height for sure.  In short, Shrinky Dinks were sheets of plastic that one would color, cut out, bake, and watch shrink to a miniature size to be placed on a little display stand.  Doesn't sound like much fun, but man...I loved 'em as a kid and I wanted to try them again.  Thanks to the vintage toy store Pop! Culture, I was able to.

One of my concerns was whether or not the Shrinky Dinks would actually still "work" after 27 years in a box (and, you know, if the plastic sheets were coated with toxic chemicals not regulated in the early '80s), but the contents of said box looked, for all intents and purposes, brand new once I got a look at them.

The eight characters chosen were fairly obvious ones, except for the hideous exclusion of the Thing.  Seriously, he could have easily replaced a C-lister like Doctor Octopus.  It's not like Marvel had to keep up with a villain quota or something.  Having, I don't know, a female character might have been nice as well, but that obviously wasn't a big concern with the people who put this package together.

Here I am with Franks and Beans cohort Larry, preparing the characters for the oven.  LOOK HOW EXCITING THIS STUFF IS!

Ready for the oven.  The set only came with four colored pencils, so a few sacrifices had to be made.  The Hulk is wearing blue pants (sacrilege, I know), and any other visible skin is pretty much a softer shade of red.  Dr. Doom's armor is "colored" in with a regular pencil.  Larry decided to go with the opposite color scheme for Doctor Octopus...maybe he's the Mirror Universe Doctor Octopus or something.

Shrinky Dinks curl up in the oven before flattening back out.  All except for Doom, because Doom curls for no man!

And here they are, out of the oven.  Cap was a casualty, but that's a risk you always take.

As you can see, the results were SPECTACULAR!  Oh, and Iron Man also doubles as a love note to Larry's girlfriend.

Shrinky Dinks turned out to be as fun as I remembered them.  As I said before, they don't sound fun at all until you actually give 'em a try for yourself.  It's too bad they aren't as available as they used to be...in any case, I imagine that I could make these at least once every 20 years.  Maybe even more frequently!  Awesome.

And speaking of Larry (and awesome), there's a new episode of Franks and Beans out.  So you should watch it.  Everyone should.  Here it is!